Long hard day

Today is one of those days. I'm sick with a nasty head cold that just keeps getting worse and I wish I had a clone to care for the children so I could spend the day in bed recooperating. That is of course based on the hope that sleeping would cure the feeling that my head is going to explode.

I awoke at 6:45am to find Calin standing at the foot of my bed declaring he had to throw up. Things kind of went down hill from there. I won't bore you with the details but it was one of those days that the kids were horrible and I really needed some help. Darin was able to leave work a little early (not soon enough) and has taken the kids to get McDonalds and then to scouts with him. Bless his heart.

So I'm sitting here at the computer sipping a bowl of soup and listening to the passing cars. And I'm alone. It has occurred to me that I can't remember the last time I was home alone in the last 5 years. The kids are always with me. Of course I go places without them on occasion, but never do they go places while leaving me at home, even with Darin b/c we always do things as a family. I feel guilty making him take them out alone b/c I know how bad it sucks. But really at this point I'm desperate. I had the diaper bag packed, and the kids ready to go the minute he got home and pretty much pushed the 3 of them out the door so I could regain some sanity. And dare I admit that it's nice?

No one is crying. No one needs a drink or a snack. No books need read, no diapers need changed, no hands need washed. No one is waiting for me to get off the computer. No one needs me. At this moment I am free to do as I please without any pressure from anyone else. Wow. It's nice.

Don't get me wrong I love my family and the work I do but it's nice to sit here in the quiet and clear my head. It will be over all too soon. Any minute now they'll come bounding through the door full of smiles and hugs eager to tell me about their time at church. I'll swoop them into my arms and watch their faces light up when they find the bubble bath waiting for them. And then I'll be back to my duties, ready again to share my love and test my patience.

And on a side note, Calin never did throw up but instead told us about his dream. I wanted to write it down this morning but in my clouded state couldn't bring myself to do so. Here's what I recall:
We (the family) were at a playground he'd never been to before and there was this red hose spraying poison water and killing flowers all over the place and we had to hide on the stairs. We hid for a long time and then we got tired so we went home to bed. The hose then ended up creeping through my bedroom window and into the bathroom and sprayed Naiya's potty chart knocking it off the wall. Daddy turned into a wolf somehow and he also said something about a rhinoceros that was missing it's horns. I wish I had written it down as he said it. Shame on me!